As my sister's second wedding anniversary comes closer it makes me reflect on how things have come so far, as well as how fast time passes without realising it.

A conversation about arranged marriages Vs standard 'love' marriages crept up and as custom goes with this group of friends, we all had our experiences and mixed opinions on the subject.

Arranged marriage to me is the term used where the couple were assisted in finding one another. It is in complete contrast to a forced marriage where one, or indeed both parties don't get a choice in the matter. Although they might eventually work out, I can't agree with them as initially the couple may not have wanted to be together and it is simply wrong in my opinion. Personally I do not see much wrong with arranged marriages as long as the couple are happy and have not been forced into the situation.

My family generally assist in marriages, as is custom when someone goes into that somewhat formidable 'marriageable age', though they are equally happy for us to find a partner ourselves. Connections from far and wide start to inquire into the person in question- no details are deemed too personal (or rather too embarassing), in the hope of finding 'the one' for their family. It's a time where within each family there are hopeful meetings between the possible couple, evaluations of which bring about tales of embarassing moments, connections, laughter and tears- both good and bad.

I smile remembering the onset of suitable grooms coming with the possibilty of taking my sister's hand in marriage and vice versa. Standing at the top of the stairs, catching snatches of conversation and glimpsing each one with menace, "who dares to come take my sister away?" I'd stand tall and demand of my parents. 'The One' happened to be in Pakistan, standing in the background and waited almost two years to see if the spark remained between them, from a few years previously when my sister met him while on holiday.

As it happened the two were indeed still compatible, and for those who like cliches- it was as if they were meant to be. We travelled as a family to Pakistan, a rather eventful and eye- opening trip but I won't digress. My sister's now husband turned out to be eager to meet her and arrived at the airport and stayed at the family house with us. This wasn't expected and my sister was extremely embarassed having been seen by a 'prospective' (as we call these possible grooms), after a 12 hour journey where none of us were looking our best. After the jet lag and adjusting to our new surroundings my sister had her chats with the Prospective, they went out together, (which caused a few eyebrows to be raised by more conservative members of the family, but it was done in vain) and within a few days of our arrival, announced that they did want to marry and soon.

In summer 2005, all members of my family, as well as 15 cousins and aunts and uncles in tow, departed for Pakistan where the wedding was to take place. There was a manic rush to arrange the majority of the wedding in little over 3 weeks, there were tears, laughter, shouts, screams and accidents galore but it was one of the happiest times I've experienced, with almost every member of my family from both sides being present.

Eventually everyone had picked out materials for dresses/suits to be made in to, for all 5 major days of the wedding. Some being ready as little as the night before the event. Cooks and serving people were hired, fireworks purchased and all other normally unnecessary excesses booked/ bought.There was a huge marquee in the gardens and guests arrived from all over and slept everywhere! The wedding took place over five main days; there was the 'rang' which is the announcement of the wedding and an excuse to throw powdered colour over the to- be in laws, hen night when the bride has henna painted over her, stag night, marriage ceremony where the bride actually leaves and the huge feast at the end like a reception. Each night was entailed with singing, dancing and much eating. The atmosphere was thick with excitement and reflection of the married ones of their big day, and the younger one's gossiping and fantasising of what theirs will be like.

After the buzz of the wedding, when my sister was away with her husband there was a palpable anti- climax at our family home. Of our party of over 25 family members who'd come from England, only one was missing but the realisation that my sister, now married, is no longer just a part of our family but a member of another was hard to swallow. We spent the remainder of the holiday visiiting my sister and husband, aswell as dining with them at our house. Enjoying the country and creating memories which I truly long to go back to enjoy a second time.

We came back again as a family, plus one addition- my brother in law. They live locally to us and visit everyday, they are definitely very much in love and it makes me swell with pride to see my sister so happy and with a husband who loves her as much as he should. As their anniversary approaches, I smile and watch happily as their marriage continues blossoming and pray that they have much more happiness to anticipate.

Forever let us smile